In honor of the occasion, the management organized a nice party. Due to the current economic crisis, however, some adjustments were made to the planned festivities.
We originally wanted to offer rides on the unicorn promised to each American citizen by the president-elect. The unicorn has yet to arrive (I’m sure it’s a shipping snafu) and ponies were too expensive (not forgetting the mess they made on the first blogiversary). Instead, the management has opted to offer goat rides.
Goats not only work to keep the grass shorn (eliminating the need for costly fossil fuels to run the lawn mower), they provide milk from which ice cream or cheese can be made, as well as manufacturing other...er…biodegradable byproducts.
Due to the current epidemic of diabetes overrunning our country, a sugarless carrot cake has been prepared in place of the four layer orange marmalade cake that is traditional at this gathering. The rumor that the goats got into the cake and the damage they did was repaired by an abundant application of fat-free, sugar-free air-whipped frosting substitute is just that: a rumor.
We will, however, begin cutting the cake from the left front corner and work diagonally to the right rear corner.
As stated on your invitations, you need bring no gifts to the party. The management of this blog is awaiting the sizeable amount of funds promised by the Blogger’s Omnibus Out-of-Money Bailout Sinecure Act (B.O.O.B.S.) in Washington (which was apparently sent via the same shipping company as the unicorn).
So come on in, grab a slice of cake, a scoop of goat’s milk ice cream and a glass of wine (note: breathalyzer tests are mandatory before leaving the party) have a seat and help celebrate our third blogiversary!
No comments:
Post a Comment